Thoughts Of Him‏

It's the last week of January, time really flies fast. When we are still together, I am counting down the happy days we lead. Now I am counting down the days he left me.

I don't have the intention to think of him, but there's times I can't help it. Few days ago, the thoughts of him grew stronger & I even dream of it. That's why there's a saying "Re You Shuo Shi, Ye You Shuo Meng". I guess it's the stuff (His Bike, His Name, His Favourite Food, Panda Figurines & Others) that is related to him, which I saw it when I am outside.

I don't know what or how should I put it across the matter, between him & Michelle. I guess I can only say/feel utterly dissapointed. Anyway, I do not have any rights to stop him for finding new love, after we are not being together.

To be frank, I really really still can't believe, we will end up in this way. I... I... don't wanna give up! I want to use my whole energy to fight in this battle! I don't allow him to do this to me! He should understand very clearly about the love I had for him. We were not supposed to breakup! The more I insist & fight in this no where relationship, all I get is hurt, pain & tears. There's only one word to describe "STUBBORN".

Maybe I am too possessive in our relationship that makes him suffocate. What I think is good for him, ended up it's a bad thing. Overrall, I do believe it takes 2 hands to clap. I don't wish to explain any more further information about us now. I wanna stop it, tiring...

Since this has happened, let it be. I need not waste my time dwelling on the past. What has dissapeared, will never appear right in front of my eyes again. The most important thing now, is to love & treat myself more better. I have been spending too much time on him, though I don't mean its wasteful.

Beautiful memories of us will be etched in my heart. Every relationship that I entered in (Including Puppy Love), I learned bit by bit. When there's love, there's hurt. I truly emphaise on this. Time will tell =)